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Day 149 of 280 · 21 weeks + 2 days

If the scan news was hard

Last reviewed · 3 min read · 5 sources · Plain-text version

Twenty-one weeks and two days. If the anomaly scan raised a question, today is about the next conversation: who to see, who comes, and what to ask.

Size this week
about the size of a carrot
Length this week
around 26.7 cm from head to toe
A couple at a small kitchen table in grey afternoon light, she in a loose sweater with a small bump writing a list in a notebook, he holding her other hand across the table.

Twenty-one weeks and two days. For most people the mid-pregnancy scan is a good day. For some, it ends with a sentence that changes the room. If yours was straightforward, read this once and keep it in mind for a friend. If it wasn't, this one is for you.

Your baby

One whole orange carrot with the leaves trimmed, on a plain pale wooden board, soft window light.

Around now your baby is around 26.7cm long from head to toe, about the size of a carrot (NHS). They're growing a fine, downy layer of hair called lanugo, which usually disappears before birth, and developing hair and eyebrows (NHS).

Your body

The scan around 20 weeks checks the baby's anatomy (MedlinePlus), and sometimes it finds something that needs a closer look, or something nobody can explain yet. The NHS advice for this week is plain: if the news from your anomaly scan was worrying, talk through your options with a doctor or midwife (NHS).

That conversation may include more scans or tests, and it may include a referral. Genetic counseling can explain how a genetic condition may affect you or your family (CDC). Abnormal ultrasound findings cover a wide range, from the placenta to the amount of fluid to the baby's development (MedlinePlus), so what matters is what your result means, from the person who can read it.

Try today

  1. The results conversation

    Time: 20 minutes

    1. Book the follow-up, and ask how long it will be and who you'll see.

    2. Decide who comes with you: your partner, or the person you'd most want beside you.

    3. Write every question down first. What exactly did the scan show? Is it certain or possible? What tests come next, and what do they involve? When will we know more? Who do we call before then?

    4. Ask whether genetic counseling would help (CDC).

    5. Give the list to the person with you, and ask them to write down the answers so you can listen.

    Make it work:

    Ask for the findings in writing before you leave. In the moment, almost nobody remembers what was said.

Watch for

  • Normal

    shock, numbness, crying in the car park, not taking it in.

    Call your provider

    with any question that comes up between appointments; MedlinePlus says to tell your doctor or midwife about any problems or concerns (MedlinePlus).

  • Normal

    a tense, aching body after a hard week.

    Call your provider right away

    for moderate to severe cramping or low abdominal pain, or any bleeding (MedlinePlus).

  • Normal

    sadness that comes in waves.

    Call your provider

    for scary, upsetting thoughts that don't go away, or extreme sadness or anger; depression and anxiety can be treated, and the sooner you start, the sooner you feel better (AAP).

For you

You don't have to decide anything today, and you don't have to know how you feel about it yet. Waiting for more information is hard, but it's allowed.

Ask your provider what support exists where you are. In the UK, the NHS points to a free helpline for this (NHS); elsewhere, your clinic will know the local equivalent.

If you're the partner: you heard the same sentence. You're allowed to be frightened too. Go to every appointment you can, carry the questions, and tell someone other than her how you're doing.

Sources

This guide is general education that summarizes published research and guidance from groups like the American Academy of Pediatrics, the CDC, and the WHO. It isn’t medical advice, and every child develops on their own timeline. Your pediatrician knows your child; if something feels wrong, call them. In an emergency, call 911.

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