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Day 166 of 280 · 23 weeks + 5 days

Say it out loud

Last reviewed · 3 min read · 6 sources · Plain-text version

Twenty-three weeks and five days. Anxiety in pregnancy is as common as depression, and both can be treated. Today you rate your week, honestly.

Size this week
about the size of a large mango
Length this week
around 28.9 cm from head to heel
A white woman with a clear bump and her partner sitting on back steps in early evening light, mugs in hand, turned toward each other mid-conversation, a garden softly blurred behind.

Twenty-three weeks and five days. The outside of this pregnancy is easy to see now. Today's note is about the inside, and about saying one honest number out loud.

Your baby

One large ripe mango on a plain pale wooden table, soft window light.

Around 28.9cm long from head to heel, about the size of a large mango (NHS). Over the next few weeks you'll feel kicks and see your tummy move (NHS). Other people will start to see it too.

Your body

The NHS's list for this week includes a line that's easy to skim past: talk to your doctor, midwife, partner, friends or family if you're feeling anxious or low (NHS). NICHD puts it simply: "It's not just postpartum, and it's not just depression"; depression and anxiety can happen during pregnancy as well as after birth (NICHD).

The AAP says anxiety during and after pregnancy is as common as depression, that these feelings are not something you caused, and that they can be treated if you seek help; left alone, they won't go away on their own (AAP). The CDC's advice is the same: see your provider as soon as possible if you think you have depression (CDC).

Try today

  1. The anxiety check-in

    Time: 2 minutes, once a week

    1. Tonight, rate the past week from 1 to 10: 1 is "I've been struggling", 10 is "I've been fine". Write the number in your phone with today's date.

    2. Add one line on what's behind it: sleep, work, money, the pregnancy itself, or nothing you can name.

    3. Do it again same time next week. If it's been low two weeks running, book a conversation with your provider. The AAP's advice is to get help early (AAP), and after the birth, the Office on Women's Health says sadness lasting more than two weeks is a reason to see your doctor (OWH).

    4. Say the number out loud to one person.

    Make it work:

    The National Maternal Mental Health Hotline, 1-833-TLC-MAMA (1-833-852-6262), is free, confidential, and answered 24 hours a day by trained counselors, in English, Spanish and more than 60 other languages (NICHD; CDC). It's there during pregnancy, not only after the birth (NICHD).

Watch for

  • Normal

    worry that comes and goes with the news of the week.

    Call your provider

    for scary, upsetting thoughts that don't go away, extreme sadness or anger, or losing interest in things you usually enjoy (AAP).

  • Normal

    feeling flat on a bad day.

    Call 911

    , or call or text 988 or 1-833-TLC-MAMA, for thoughts about harming yourself or your baby (CDC; CDC).

  • Normal

    not being sure whether what you feel counts.

    Call your provider

    if you feel like something just isn't right, in your body or your mind, even if it isn't on any list; the CDC says to reach out whenever something seems wrong (CDC).

For you

If you're the partner: ask her for the number, then listen to the line that goes with it. Don't fix it, don't compare it to your week; just hear it, and ask what would help. NICHD's Moms' Mental Health Matters has information written for partners, family and friends (NICHD). Your number counts too, so say yours.

Sources

This guide is general education that summarizes published research and guidance from groups like the American Academy of Pediatrics, the CDC, and the WHO. It isn’t medical advice, and every child develops on their own timeline. Your pediatrician knows your child; if something feels wrong, call them. In an emergency, call 911.

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